REVIEWS

NOISE- CD's, records, demo tapes, sent in or selected
mp3's- get them while they are hot (the links will probably be fuct soon)
EVENTS- Gigs, demos, memorable moments in club toilets etc
WORDS- zines, books, phone box ads

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LIVING HELL- Self-Titled CDR
Wow... this fucking rips shit up- driving crust/rock! This band is from Minneapolis MN where punks have enough metal studs on their jackets to cash them in at a recycling point and get a mortage on a house. This band sounds like they are from Mpls or Portland, but they are not your straight-forward duo-vocal D-beat crust that you might expect. In the 10 tracks, the (male) vocalist screams behind a huge wall of down-tuned, ugly guitar. They seem to have older influences- touches of Motorhead and stoner-rock, (Iron Monkey?)... I think that I might want to ride a motorcycle to this. This is what I wanted Saint Vitus to sound like when I first saw one of their albums. Besides for the galloping mainstay of the songs, there are even great atmospheric sections where they show some musicianship and pull out slow, twisted (almost hypnotising) riffs and progressions. But don't get me wrong... they don't crawl up their own ass- this music keeps chugging forward with punk pissed-off impetus. But this is one punk record for the kids who like their rawk. This is cool, and whether you have a tri-hawk or a handlebar mustach (or both <if so, then please get in touch>) I think that you should write them and try to get it. Living Hell, PO Box 8004, Minneapolis MN 55408, U.S.A.
(by em eroding Aug 14, 2005)

HIGH ON FIRE - Blessed Black Wings - Relapse Records
A new Album from high on fire... this means two things brutal riffs played by the amazing Matt Pike and well constructed master pieces of crushing Metal songs!

The Man responsible for one of the best Doom bands ever has brought us another slice from his new band High on fire. This is how every great record should be recorded take the band on tour to road test the material drop into the studio while on tour bang out a great album... hit the road again! Add to this equation not only matt pikes playing and Des Kensel's almost tribal style of drumming, and the amazing bass skills of the legendary Joe Preston (hey the man was in the melvin classic line up he knows his way round those four strings!), but add Mr Steve Albini's brutal production and yeah its a winner.

More amidiate than last album surrounded by theives the vocals touch on Lemmy's classic growl and seem stronger from all the touring high on fire do. The guitars are more crushing and the drums pound through your head while being under pinned by prestons classic grooves! This record is faster more brutal and slicker than the last... this is the sound of a band at the top of its game.

From opening track Devilution to the hammering of the beautifully tittled sons of thunder (its actually sounds like that too) its driving all the way. There are drops and riases in the dynamics more so than on surrounded by theives... its really hits home on first listen.

If you want classic riffs Matt's always had them but now he's putting them to more of a brutal vival selection of songs! For those who liked sleep it maybe a bit fast and crunching but I feel he's made another classic like he was threating on Surrounded by theives (which is a good album, just this one is great!) So far one of my favourite albums released this year!
(By Tim Holehouse 06 Mar 2005)

VICTIMS/ FROM ASHES RISE split LP
Not a really new release from these super heroes of HC crust, but one that I just picked up from Havoc records in Minneapolis. Great cover art by old-skool punk artist Pushead.
FROM ASHES RISE: Well, fuck, what can I say? From Ashes Rise are one of my favourite bands... I saw them tour with WOLFBRIGAGE in Feb of this year and unfortunately they didn't pack quite the punch that they had delivered previously (oh my gawd! the tiny gig at the Swan a year or so earlier had to be one of the most religious experiences of my life... Amebix patches were glowing like holy relics and the monks of neo-power ballad-crust were banging their heads as if to open the very gates of heaven!)
On this split however, From Ashes are at their fiery best, with riffs so heavy and monolithic little splinters of your skull fall into your Cocoa Puffs and you inadvertantly eat them like some fuct up XXX episode. Then the drums kick in and it's all their special Yankee version of D-Beat madness with quick coarse vocals egging you on into madness. Sometimes the lyrics land a tad too far on the poetics side and hardly any meaning can be gleaned from them, but, doubtless, they reflect some alienation with modern industrialised society and the subordinate roles dished out to serve it (me thinks). I'm a big fan of their gentle yet spooky emo bits that lure you down some melancholic sink hole only to release the sleeping horror that dwells beneath the ruins.
VICTIMS: Swedish yah? Well than you can expect that these kids know their Scandinavian thrash. Fast-paced screamed power chording in the all-too familiar Scando D-fashion... and yet, these guys embrace all that is good in this genre. They obviously have a good understanding of capital R- O- C- K- and thus, their assault is varied and hard-hitting with parts that sound as equally AC/DC as WOLF PACK. The vocals remind me of SKIT KIDS who play a similar line of Scando-rock... don't know if that's just a coincidence. Favourite song: the dismally nihilist WE ARE DEAD which rocks in a more mosh-tastic way and speals out "So we are dead, born and rasised to be dead/ 3 seconds left, not time to spill, no retrospect, just time to wait"... I think it might be about insects. Overall, this doesn't rock my socks off as much as the FROM ASHES side, but if you like it hard and fast baby then check them out.
Havoc Records, POBox 8585, Minneapolis, MN 55408. http://www.havocrex.com
(em, Aug 2004)

FILTHPACT EP
Oh we love home burnt releases. This EP starts out with an analysis of "the scene" spoken over ye ol' Scottish drums and then breaks into break-neck-speed power-violence thrash chaos. Duel vocals, one sounds like a goat and the other sounds like a lemming, both on crack and being asphyxiated by electrical wires. Nasty dirty crust scum from these metal-obsessed throw-backs to the legendary age of metal/ punk crossover. I love it. Features members of former Aberdeen anomolies such as FUDROT, BASTARD SON OF FUD and other indecently titled projects. If DOOM were formed before your father even developed testicles, then email these nutters and see if they'll sell you a CD (6 songs). blackboxrecords(at)hotmail.com
(em, Aug 2004)

CEARR- "MILL A H-UILE RUD" CD-
I believe that these are 3 Yanks living in the boondocks of Washington State playing Gaelic punk rock. Which doesn't mean that there are fiddles and shit in the songs; In fact it sounds more like J-CHURCH or your rousing sing-a-long melodic punk except unless you speak the ancient Scottish language all the lyrics sound like gibberish. I swear that one line of one song says "eating spaghetti and pulling your chair out"... am I just ignorant? Or is it just the voices again? They tell me things. I like this release, it's not exactly my cup of tea being all melodic and pleasantly sing-along. My only complaint is that the judging from the photo on the back and my experience having met some of the people in this band when they lived in Edinburgh, they just look to sweat and loveable. It makes me want to slap them... in fact, they commit the unrockable sin of holding a chicken, yes some sort of unholy cock-a-doodle doo farm animal in their arms as they insipidly smile for the camera! A bloody chicken! Or maybe a rooster. I mean I'm all for bands getting their respective cocks out in band photos, but you know what I mean. Do you? No address on CD so this whole review is pointless. Go to an OI POLLOI gig and look for the beardy ginger geezer doing a stall- he probably has a copy.
(em, Aug 2004)

KONTROVERS self-titled LP-
I am told that this is the first LP by Swedish KONTROVERS and that the 2nd one really rips it up... Nonetheless, this one is good too. Not a particularly Scando sound, more just Euro-punk if you know what that means... slightly crusty, people with baseball caps on that look as oily from as the hair of the punks wearing them, euro-squatters wearing punk utility belts hanging with torches, Leatherman tools and various army pouches, multitudes of dreadlocked festival goers pouring sweat and writhing in a mass. These are images that come to mind. The music is fast sometimes, slowing to crunching hardcore darkness. Lots of darkness. 20 songs. We saw them play at the K-Town festival 2004 in Kopenhagen and they destroyed.

Sept 2003
ACTIVE SLAUGHTER "'AVE A BUTCHERS" CD
I got given this CD to review when Active Slaughter played a benefit gig at the Brixton Windmill for the Newchurch Guinea Pigs anti-vivsection campaign in August of this year. The gig itself was alright... with Active Slaughter playing their charged-up, edgey politcal chants and Jake, the singer, staring out into the crowd (or above their heads) as if glaring back into the eyes of the animal-abusing,, exploitative enemy he spends so much of his lyrical power combating. Active Slaughter are an intense band and sometimes when I watch them I feel uneasy... the music itself is basic punk rock. In fact- one has the feeling that they've already heard an Active Slaughter song the first time they hear it,.. Indeed, there are some VERY familiar guitar lines being formed into new songs... others are just direct lifts (sometimes piss takes as in the CRASS "Big A, little A" reference). Take the quick-paced anarcho ranting of CONFLICT but reduce the onslaught of words and ideas into the chorus-friendly chunka-pogo of OI POLLOI and a slew of other in-yer-face anarcho punk bands circa mid-90's.. a healthy dose of CLASS WAR mixed with the ANIMAL LIBERATION FRONT and then some guitar-leaden old-school HC punk, (more via raw early 70's/80's when the slurred words would come streaming out faster than the pissed off (possibly pissed as well) singer could utter them). You've now prepared your meal & yer gonna eat every fucking last bit of it (don't worry- it's vegan).

And, just as in their live set, what stands out on this CD is the sheer ugly anger, the unbelievably undiminished outrage at things that most people take no offense to, take for granted or spend their lives cocooning themselves away from the reality of. Animals die unecessarily. People are nationalistic. Cops are bad. Men are macho. Farmers produce at the expense of animals and the environment. People get raped. The church is a corrupt den of hipocrasy. These are all things that ACTIVE SLAUGHTER find intolerable about life on this planet. They play catchy, sing-along songs of protest that border on the naiive, ask for the whole bakery instead of a free loaf of bread from the owners, demand the impossible and make some very serious bodily threats on all manner of perceived enemies.. threats that are going to take an army of Active Slaughters to carry out. Promises of bodily harm abound in almost every song, with the bad guys getting their come-uppance in the end as the veggie anarcho punx go marchin in and put the boot in. Check out all the lyrics to "My Foot in Your Mouth", the purely righteous but slightly awkward condemation of "Paedophile Priest" or (the hilarious) lyrics of "Active Slaughter": "You couldn't give a fuck, as you bite into a lamb chop. You make me fucking sick- Selfish meat eating shit. Hope you fuckin' die- ha ha" Obviously they are havin a laugh as well as havin a say; the condemnations are peppered with the funny. It's the humour of Class War, with bleeding, lynched cops, aristocrats and carnivores as punch lines.

Favourite song on the CD: RAPIST 666. Like alot of AS's in-yer-face lyrics, it's very Over The Top and , at first, I had a bit of a knee-jerk reaction to it (bein such a over-analytical pc fuck)... thinking: "Why are these blokes writing about rape?" But, the genuine pure undiluted vitriol of the song, it's over-lapping because-they-are-spit-out-so-fast duel vocals, even the somewhat questionable references to "frying" rapists (capital punishment, anyone?) seem to point to boys who didn't sit down to write a manifesto... they are just reacting to an issue and spit out a stream of scorn against someone they see violating another human being's right to happiness.

At their worste Active Slaughter are a punk version of the SUN newspaper- stirring up base anger and calling for heads to roll in the doomed nolstagic rhetoric of black and white issues... At their best they are punk in its purest form- what it was always meant to be, always has been and always will be. Anger as a motor. An audio expression of defiance amidst a sea of disempowered compliance and collusion. Fuck what it sounds like, just scream your message loud enough and someone will listen. If they don't, to hell with 'em.

"Ave a Butcher" available direct from ACTIVE SLAUGHTER, PO Box 35913, London N17 9YP, activeslaguhter(at)hotmail.com or see www.activeslaughter.co.uk

06 May 2003
ARTIMUS PYLE 'FUCKED FROM BIRTH' CD
(See gig review above in EVENTS)

EVENTS

6th April 2005
High on fire/ Winnebago deal/ Castillo/ blood island raiders @ The Garage (highbury, London)

Last time high on fire played London the had mastodon in support and played with one of my favourite bills I've ever seen. So I was a little excited about tonights show.

Tonight kicks off with the same band that opened last time they played the blood island raiders. The play the sorta stoner rock that makes you hark back to the days when kyuss roamed the earth. they play with an old skool style of metal that never pleases to fail as the reverend Al hred blistering riffs out of his guitar, samus swings his dreads, paul bashes the kit and warrens powerful vocals slide over the wall of noise nicely! Well crafted songs and a good hard working band.

Castilo on the other hand are a let down... they are ffectivley an isis, neuorosis, cult of luna tribute band. Yes they are epic but nothing else they go nowhere have no real stand out like other bands in this vain. They have spent too long preening themselves and working on their syncro head banging I think.

So when the Winebago deal hit the stage... its a breathe of fresh air... at the end of the first so a thermin and keyboard bit weirds it out a bit... but for the rest of the set its gruff ben and ben action. This two piecce never fail to idsapoint and tonight is no exception. Brilliant to the last, these boys rock hard!

High on fire literally hit the stage... bang open into a punishing riff and destroy! Matt Pike knows his way round the frett board and his gruff lemmy swallowing razor blades vocals cut through. The sound is a little shite as ever in the garage, but still the band are so fucking good it matteres not! Des batters his kit like a man consumed! While Mr Joe preston new boy to this outft but no stranger to the monsterous riff in a power trio pounds his bass strings liem there is no tomorrow! As a unit too they are stupidly tight and together and the songs just keep coming... a fair few off the cracking new album blessed black wings, with the odd old favs to boot. They play like there will be no tomorrow... your left feeling like the room is spinning from each note that rings out. They play for what seems like only a short while but turns out to be nearly an hour... this is the magic of high on fire... they are captivating to watch and the chit chat is minimal (although matt does say wow this is the best coty in the world... ah matt thanks but I bet you say that every night! ha ha!) But this is aband at the top of their game and blow me further away than they did last time I saw them with mastodon. Long live high on fire!
(Tim Holehouse)

24/01/05
NAPALM DEATH and MISTRESS - @ The Underworld

Tonight the venue is rammed for the masters of grind playing at a relativley intermate show, there are old school punks and metallers alike, along with some young kids who've only just discovered the Death!

But before Napalm death hit the stage we have another bunch of hairy brummy big bys to deal with. New earache signings Mistress! I saw these guys once before in a small pub in worcester and they where ace! Slightly sloppy and sludgey in places before, but as the second album the chornovisor showed they have upped the pace and tightened up. Tonight they are super heavy and charged! Playing mostly from the second record but road testing material from their thrid album which they are still writing. They are tight and heavy and the pace is fast and some wicked blast from Mr Mick kenny provide a subtle beat for duncan to riff over, while Dave CUNT taughts the crowd and howls like a banshee! This then all been topped off by Brian mcfadden looky likey on bass pumling out fuzzy bass lines and throwing the horns! Kids fly every where and Mistress destroy new material sound great and points to fast more blasting heavier directions... leaving me thinking the new album is gonna be worth the short wait while they write it.

How can napalm death top that I wonder... then they literally hit the stage! almost out of nowhere!

Barney is doing his mad chicken dance and shane's hair is flying everywhere! Wow! a volley of fierce fast riffs fill the air! with battering drums played and break neck speed! All in days work for napalm death really!

After a short while barney explains that they are going to try and play pretty much all of the new album "the code is red... long live the code!" as they plough through the tracks such as instruments of persuation and the tittle track its clear to see they've not lost their touch and playing heavy as fuck brutal riffs! The set is broken up slightly with old fav suffer the children. The more they rock harder and harder the more the stage diving continues!

A few covers are throw in from their recent leaders not follows album including a discharge cover of which barney exclaims that without this band we would not be here! Then agnostic front and later the dead kennedy's classic "Nazi punks fuck off". After playing pretty much the whole new album, they pile into some classics and even an appearance by jeff walker of carcass in a cowboy hat and being a lot smaller than I remember him ever being for "Pledge yourself to you!" some taunting of ex vocalist Lee Dorrian (in a friendly manor) is followed and then scum off the first album... still sounding so fresh after all these years! They end on Seige of power and after an hour and half I'm shattered I can't beleive what I've just seen! they played hard and fast with little interuption! Napalm death are still one of the most brutal bands this country has to offer the new album is sounding as fresh as ever... the masters of grind still destroy everything in their path!

Set List- Instinct of Survival, Unchallenged Hate, Silence is Deafening, Right You Are, Diplomatic Immunity, Code is Red...Long Live The Code, Climate Controllers, Instruments of Persuasion, The Great and the Good, Suffer the Children, Breed to Breathe, War's No Fairytale, Lowlife, Blind Justice, Sold Short, All Hail the Grey Dawn, Vegetative State, Pledge Yourself to You (feat. Jeff Walker!), Losers, Striding Purposefully Backwards, Scum, Life?, The Kill, Deceiver, You Suffer, Nazi Punks F*** Off & Siege of Power.
(by Tim Holehouse)

30/07/04
CATHEDRAL - Covenry Jail House! -

Ok, so tonight‚s show isn‚t in the actual Jail house itself (which would have been interesting) but a pub called the Jail house, which is round the back of Coventry's police HQ. Nice setting then for the lords of Doom! It‚s a home town show tonight and it seems that most of the Midlands have descended upon this fairly small venue to see the Mighty, Cathedral! The reason I'm here is not only to review this show but to play support too which, I must say is an honour... I won't mumble on about my band any more though!

After us are the worst and most clueless band I've seen in ages... Torso Horse... Shite NU- metal with face paint, bad drum solos, a people carrier with their name professionally etched onto it (driven by Daddy who seems to be the manager) and a singer with a speech impediment... Bless Œem for trying so hard to rock stars, but when you sound like a shit version of Korn, it reminds me of why so many bands are totally clueless of how this whole thing should work.

Next up to save the day are local boys Sika Redem who deserve their place on the bill, they destroy us with their big heavy prog-metal riffs ala Neurosis, isis and cult of luna and vocals that tear the heart along the lines of the botch scream and today is the day howl... so intense and ferocious is their set that the singer throws up at the end of the last song, onto the stage! They blew me away, and are now officially my second favourite Coventry band ever! The scariest thing is they are so young too... so they will only get better... frightening this band will be blowing people's minds in a few years and I hope they become massive, cause they fucking deserve it!

Next though is what we've all been waiting for. Lee Dorrian and the boys hit the stage having sound checked with the Probot song Lee did with Dave Grohl. I was very excited about how ace they sounded, they rip straight into the set... Scott back on Bass after some time out the band, Gaz Jennings stiff is the man of the riff, they play a mixture of songs from throughout their career tonight (also available on their recent greatest hits album). The doomy stuff is super doomy, the rockier stuff frantic... Lee Dorrian proves why he's such a respected Front man by almost literally holding the audience in the palm of his hand. He holds the mic in his mouth doing Zombie arms... scares the fuck out of stage invaders... the band pump the crowd and they go ape shit... Blistering.

They are even called back for an encore and yep they play it... Hopkins (Witch Finder General) an incredible song and has the crowd chanting along. Sweat dripping from everywhere... tonight in their home town (although they all live in London now) Cathedral made a cracking jail break! I can't wait to see them again as they and Sika redem made tonight one of the most special shows I've been at this year!
(By Tim Holehouse)

11th October 2003

SHE-RAWK, The Dakinis, the Blue Minkies, Lady Mcuk + Unskinny Bop & Elvina DJing @ 67 Crawford Road.

Someone from LADY MUCK hadn't shown up yet, so after some discussion (and people racing off to get KETTLE LEADS) the BLUE MINKIES decided to go on first. Phil, the sound person, didn't get a chance to do a proper mic test or anything, so the sound was kinda loud and rawkus, but with the band's pouncing, bare, punky edge, I think it sounded alright. Blue Minkies are kinda Electroclash, kinda Slits meets Le Tigre, kinda a mix of early punk and pop sensibilites... When I say early punk I mean like the Fall, Annie Anxiety, more art school than mohawk... plus someone plays a little itty bitty hand held keyboard and the drummer just pounds one big lurching beat. You made me blush! We had a good crowd right off the bat and the 100+ kids packed into the little hall, were into the Minkies.

Next thing the LONDON RADICAL CHEERLEADERS came on and shook their pom-poms around chanting "Riot not Diets!" Personally, I was shocked and appalled at the blatant American cultural imperialism as represented by the cheerleaders. Nightmarish visions of yankee jock football players dodging cops in a summit protest filled my mind... The conference centre as goal posts... the molotovs as oblong "footballs"... it all fit together. I couldn't concentrate, the pom poms just kept swooshing around and around and around. I thought to myself: "the fucking kettle leads, dude! How could you forget the leads for the amps at a gig!" Anyway, check out the rad cheerleaders at a demo near you... or visit their website on: www.radicalcheerleaders.co.uk

Next on were LADY MUCK... they got interupted by the invasion of 5 police officers who said that they were gonna call back-up (their words: "the Enforcer") and smash into the place if we didn't let them look for 1 person inside. Before this, Lady Muck tuned their guitars for awhile and then hit the crowd with a 3-piece blast of what can only be described as pure grunge. Think Hole, think angsty vocals with heavy rock guitar. I was going down memory lane and remembering the first time I heard a Mudhoney single (or that first Hole single! or Babes in Toyland gigs in Minneapolis!) when people starting shouting about the cops at the door. People ended up letting the cops in... not sure about the legal standpoint on that one as there was not reason to believe that a crime was being committed on the premesis at the time. Anyone know? They didn't produce a warrant. But, anyway, they came in, the band stopped, the lights went up and these pigs walked through the unfriendly but amused crowd ...and they never found their guy. What guy? Anyway, LADYMUCK play the Swan this Oct 22nd, so check out their set minus the police presence.

Then THE DAKINIS mounted the stage like goddesses of rock and played the best set I've ever seen them play (I've seen them once before).. I think they were drunk. Actually I know that they were drunk- mostly. But it was good. They played faster and harder than at the Swan the previous week. The sound was heavier too. By this point Phil the sound person had perfected his craft and they, the sound, the communal sigh of relief when the pigs finally fucked off, all pinnacled into one crescendo of She-Rawkiness (or something). They played maybe 25 minutes and then reformed into the GIRL SCOUTS for their impromptu encore. It was fun. If you like the garage punk, people who spread their legs out and hold their guitars realllly lowww and thunk thunk thunk away, you'll love them. The drummer uses really big sticks too. Pound pound pound.

THE DJ'S: Well, read the last review and you'll guess that we like UNSKINNY BOP UNSKINNYBOP88(at)YAHOO.CO.UK. AT the gay bar? We ARE the fucking gay bar! They play fun music and the good thing about gigs like this, queer and mixed-but-aware events, is that (usually) noone is there to cause shit or prove their masculinity/punkness/whatever! Cheezy rock, disco, new wave, German synth, all the classics that have ever been or never will be get spun in little circles for your dancing pleasure. It was a nice end to the night... Little dancing affinity groups formed and mixed and re-constellated as the gig turned to dance party... and I didn't even notice when ELVINA took over the decks, but I remember thinking how good the music was and looking over and seeing that the change-over had happenned. Both the Unskinny Bop ladies and Elvina have their hearts and their heads in the right places and they know how to make the kids boogie unabashedly.

Plus the benefit raised nearly £200 for Rape Crisis and a womens' self-defense group.

23rd August 2003

The Gossip, Hawnay Troof, Barcelona Pavilion and Hello Cuca + Unskinny Bop @ The Spitz

HELLO CUCA from Murcia in the south-east of Spain. Oh my gawd, what can I say? I had the fortunate experience of catching Hello Cuca at last year's LADYFEST in London at the Garage and they stood out amongst alot of hot raw talent in that action pact weekend. They are a stripped down to the rythm and blues rock trio who just play it simple and play it good. The bassist usually looks bored. The guitarist struts nonchalantly around like a cocksure old-school guitar legend- think BB King and Chuck Berry in a Ladyfest context. She's good! There's nothing complicated about it, they are just a good rock n roll band. I stood around unashamedly mesmorised by the guitarist, wondering if she liked boys.
Despite a few broken strings and a drawn-out non-beginning, they played a good set and got the place in the mood for a night of rockin out on the disco floor.

BARCELONA PAVILION were, I believe a 4 piece, unless the laptop counts too... sampling beats and mixing it with live playing, Gang of Four, herky jerky popstering, cute bassist who jumped into the crowd, all the kids lovin it, the computer geek with the laptop doing his best to be totally deadpan.... chanting and singing and leaping about. It was good.

HAWNAY TROOF is Allison Wolfe from Bratmobile & Chris from XBXRX's "band". Imagine 2 members of some radical cheerleaders troupe who got lost at the demo in their tight satin shorts and wandered into a gay disco to try to get some water to wash the pepper spray off of their bodies.... They find themselves on the stage of a mad big fat beat karaoke contest and just let loose with some old-school rap and dirty funk... the crowd goes wild. Arms and legs bop and dangle and twitch. Big ol' booties shake and the nerdy boy cheerleader eyes up the drums and decides to have a go to spectacular effect. In short, Hawnay Troof brought the muthafuckin house down! They are like the casio ultra-chants of Le Tigre and some offcuts of Public Enemy and Funkadelic all squeezed into an orange juicer and only magic comes out into your glass. Yum yum!

THE GOSSIP, however, can in no way be compared to a freshly squeezed fruit drink... They are more like the SOUL sista band of the riot/disco/punk revolution. The lead singer has an amazing voice and the entire set was a pleasure... fucking good, really. It's hard to describe but they are just a good, good (did I mention good good?) band and you should check them or their records out if you get a chance. If Aretha Franklin was a punk rocker then this is another entirely lame comparison to a band or person of days gone by in a sad attempt to desribe the undescribable! It's cool to see people who don't fit classical stereotypes of beauty and ultra-coolness rockin the mic and making us feel like we can all just be ourselves and feel it with an amazing amount of passion. Yeah.

Unskinny Bop DJs Tamsin and Ruth were on next and they took all the good elements of everything that I just mentioned above and stretched it to the disco max... pumping out the cheese, the oldies, the newies, punk, she-rock, everything really... and, most importantly, the dance floor was humming and everyone was just going for it and having a good ol' time. I was drunk- I'll admit that, but I felt like I was on ecstasy or something because the vibe was just so nice and unbefitting a club nite so near the Ubercool Eastern Territories. If you are into riot pop, disco punk and destroying destructive body self-imaging, then hook up with these ladies of size, self-proclaimed lards of the dance floor, Unskinny Bop- UNSKINNYBOP88(at)YAHOO.CO.UK

20 August 2003

MURDER OF ROSA LUXEMBOURG, ARMY OF FLYING ROBOTS, TRENCHER, WHEELS at the Swan, London
I had started work the day before the gig and didn't get out until 7pm that night, so things were kinda rushed and maybe you can excuse how shite this gig review really is. Maybe.
I rushed home from work and met E in Brixton and we proceeded to the tube. Oh drat! There's cops all over the station and all our little bearded, heroin-injecting friends who like to give us free travel passes for £2 a shot (get it? £2 a shot?) have all buggered off to easier pastures. The sell-outs! We wander around looking suspicious for a while, pondering the futility of the buses on such late notice and then (uhhg) bit the bullet and blow most of a 5iver each on a little magnetic strip bordered in pink with 1,2,3,4 written on it. Oh Victoria line with a beer foaming into your mouth and the people running hither and tither and all over the fucking place getting their briefs in a twist. The click click click of unseen track sliding metal-against metal just beneath you as the excitement of going somewhere starts to curdle the foam in your stomach despite your cynical "seen it done it" pout.
I don't know what it is about our brand of Sarf London Scum, but, besides for almost none of us being from South London, we have the odd habit of needing to get pissed up to go to a gig north of the thames. It must be some strange compensation for the air pressure changing or something. Nonetheless, E and I had the audacity to slam a few brews outside the venue as the Hardcore kids were already rockin out (they don't need alcohol to rock out- or they can afford the prices inside) to the first band. Thus, we missed WHEELS which is a shame cause they're supposed to rock.

TRENCHER were on next. I think I've seen Trencher at the Swan about 3 times and this was by far the best so far. I'm not a big fan of Locustish, screamO meets casio, but their fukt up song structures and total disregard for all things music were quite charming tonight rather than annoying or likely to drive you into the bar. They seem like talented people and their faces seem to show up in odd combinations of other bands.

ARMY OF FLYING ROBOTS were good. Yeah, man, like, they rocked really really really hard. The bassist would pick up his bass like one who rocked most hard and even though everything was so distorted and over the top and screamed that you couldn't always hear the music, you just knew that it rocked on most wholeheartedly. At least the sweaty male audience jostling into each other in the front row did. It was a nice change from HC gigs where everyone just minds their own space, listens analytically and tries not to bump into each other, but some of the boys were (ahg) bumping into each other... and lifting each other above each others' heads in bad, fake "I've just stage-dove even though there isn't a stage" style and having far too much fun. For this reason, I can not recommend Army of Flying Robots as a family band. However if you like full-on rockin hardcore, then check them out.

MUDER OF ROSA LUXEMBOURG came on too late and by this time me and E were carrying each other on each others' shoulders, running about frantically, and punching anyone that we came near. This made it difficult to hear the set (or remember it)... but I think that I remember it being kinda good. I'll ask E and maybe she will tell me, but it's hard for her to talk with the bandages still on. We will discuss it with each other. Each other.

Bye!

16 May 2003

BORN DEAD ICONS / SKEW WHIFF / DESTITUTION in Liege, Belgium
So we revved up the London Devil Van at 4.15am, filled the back with human detritus and the tank with the ancient-fern-piss that wars are made of, and blasted towards Dover... tonight= we shall rock to glory mi compadres de scumbagos. Besides for accidentally taking a wrong turn as we entered the Sea France terminal and driving straight into the big building where the snap of latex gloves and the eerie sniffs of sniffer dogs are frequently heard, there were no hitch-ups. The geezers in the "can you please step out of the van" building seemed amused when I told them that we had voluntarilly drove into the building by taking a wrong turn... I don't know if it was my candid admission or the thought of probing my unwashed lower regions, but they just let us through.

Blah, blah blah... anyway we did eventually get to the Belgian capital of dog jobbies and cheap speed, Liege. The gig was in a social venue/ centre called C.P.C.R. located at no.11 Jon Ruelle. Up the road at no.1 is a long-standing squat that has cafes sometimes and is filled with very nice (and mad) people. AT CPCR there were several stalls, cheap beer and a fairly large black stage room in the back. Liege, if nothing else, is filled with characters. If you were wise enuff to stay sober and watch the dynamics and cartoon-like personalities playing out their dramas in front of you, it could be entertaining. If, however, you had that one Jupiler too many or accepted anything resembling a white cakey powder on the fingertip of a stranger, then it is as if you have entered the maelstrom. It's as if you were invisible to the nutters and they operated on a different plane of reality... but now it seems as if the air smells 'different' and frazzled heads turn slowly towards you, noticing your presense for the first time, and milky eyes take in your form, recording it into booze-fuelled brain circuits... grinding teeth inside contorted faces grind out the melody of "Welcome to Liege" and the spindley arms take you in and soon you are in the front row of SKEW WHIFF headbanging as if your life depended upon it.

SKEW WHIFF are for the most part from Liege; Willie the vocalist was in HIATUS and Ross the drummer was in some dark punk grumpy band from Oakland California (there it is again!) The other band members' origins are shrouded in mystery. If you like grind-core and speed-metal, then you will like SKEW WHIFF. There is alot of fast wrist action going on and an over-all asphyxiatingly heavy sound trying to ram its way into your head. At points the heavy riffola action left me uninspired, but when they sounded like the perfect fusion of hardcore punk and stadium metal (or does everything remind me of IRON MAIDEN lately?) they excelled. They ended their set with a sludgey cover of JUDAS PRIEST's "Breaking the Law" which alternately inspired dissapointment or the sign of the beast shot out at the end of a skinny forearm, depending on how much of a purist was listening.

DESTITUTION are also Belgian, but hail from Luxenbourg. I liked the beginning of their set as they sounded like very early British street punk ala GBH and VARUKERS... you know, the band names that big spikey leather jackets call out for and punx with mohawks will swear their undying visual loyalty to. But as the set went on and the bondage trousers started to look more and more high street... and as a few songs broke out into (excuse me whilst I vomit) "melodic punk" (think bad RANCID), I strayed into the bar room to check out the distros. Not a bad band, just not my thing.

There was a woman named EVETTE who had been hand-binding punk books who had a stall! There were address books, blank diary-style books, all sorts and sizes of books that she had made herself, all out of recycled junk. One had a chaos star cut out of its front so you could see through the cover and onto the front page inside... some had found-fabric cut into the shape of fire protecting their diy spines... they were fucking cool!
There was also a french-Canadian guy YVAN selling cepia-printed "cards" of these amazingly intricate collages he had done... It sounds very arty and it is, but these were like mandalas of doom, strange spinning shields made of spears and axes and skulls and snakes hovering above wastelands of collapsing statues and starving children. FREDDIE BAER meets Dystopic punk graphics. Some were very beautiful and others dark, but all of an unknown personal mysticism that perhaps only Yvan could explain. U can get them from Bustum Press www.bustum.com or PO Box 32078, Montreal QC H2L 4Y5 Canada.

Last on were BORN DEAD ICONS, who are also from Quebec and who dish out a very driving MOTORHEAD-esque brand of Dark Punk. All the expected references are there for labeling a band from N. America such as HIS HERO IS GONE and FROM ASHES RISE etc... but in the end it's the fact that the guy's voice sounds so fuckin much like LEMMY of MOTORHEAD that sets them apart. The songs sound bass-driven, but it's hard to hear what is the bass and what's the guitars as the whole fucker is so down-tuned and distorted. The songs lurch forward with a steady mid-tempo rock structure but seem fast due to lots of flicking to and fro plectrums and the dreaded Skreeeraaape! of plastic down guitar strings at the appropriate moments. It was a good set and they played for a decent while... I was missing the other vocalist who's on their recordings (not the "I can't believe it's not Lemmy" one) who added a higher toned but straight up screechy punk sound to some of the songs... I'm not sure what happenned to him, but the songs that he sang were still played but without his screechy tones. Albeit, it was a glorious set and they are a very good band, but somewhat flatter for the lack of the two vocalists, as if they are now set more firmly in ONE direction and there's less variety in the sound. But, mistake me not, for the rock very hard indeed.

In the end, we made it out of Liege alive... I didn't even take speed. I did step in a dog jobby though. We went to the street where someone had been sticking little cocktail flags of nations in each canine custard pie, but this practise seems to have died. Maybe they died of some disease only artistic types can get from working around too much faeces. We shoveled ourselves back into the Life Destroying Vehicle and headed towards Calais, it's various cheap warehouse offies (a case of Budvar for £11!!), and the bloated white whale of Sea France that would swallow us up and spit us out on the white cliffs of Dover.

07 May 2003
TURBONEGRO, DIVISION OF LAURA LEE @ The Garage
Well, I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea, but I was totally pissed up at this gig, having sat in the scummy little park behind the Garage for about 2hours before the bands were on. A variety of rock people, punx and scumizoids were gathered on the grass lubricating their very souls with the devil's tonic in preparation for the hard cock rock to come.

By the time I staggered in past security my crotch was bulging with excitement... or was that the 2 Stellas that were stuck down there? Oh, the Garage... what a place! I missed DIVISION OF LAURA LEE completely so I can't say much about them; some of the Swedish people congregated before the gig reckoned that they were very good rock n' roll, but who knows. TURBONEGRO finally made their grand, ALICE COOPER-esque entrance and began the hard work of sweating, swearing and rocking forth into the night. Whoa whoa whoa whoa.

I dunno.... maybe it was late in the tour and they were knackered or it's the price of reforming to make alot of cash, but there seemed to be a certain genuine energy missing; as if they were slightly going through the motions of rockin' out (like EuroBoy's mandatory riding on the shoulders of some poor stooge) but it was just pure theatre and had no essence. This of course coming from a man who spent one quarter of the night pouring beers into found pint glasses whilst sitting on the stinking men's bog surrounded by congealing urine and sick (sexy). I mean, they blew the hell out of the HELLACOPTERS who played last month and who were even more shallowly all stage presence and little substance, but I'm sure that I'm not the only die-hard that felt the mighty TURBO going a bit limp.

Having said that, when "The Age of Pamparius" came on one simply had to dive into the pit, jostle the mainly sweaty boy crowd (repressed homosexuality anyone?) and fucking lose it! The pit was aggressive and kinda MACHO-MAN but not in the VILLAGE PEOPLE sense. Luckily it was crowded enuff that noone could clobber you very well- we just bounced around off each other occassionally screaming incoherent affirmatives towards the wall of noise. And, oh yeah, I saved a puppy from being trampled and spent the rest of the night sheilding it's furry little ears from the deafening roar. But, in short, there was a bit of punk glory and it was cool to finally see the greatest (semi) gay cock rock band in the world, but somehow I feel that next time around (if there is one) the sell-out, souless feeling will be stronger.

Long live Turbonegro because Turbonegro is dead.

06 May 2003
ARTIMUS PYLE, NATION OF FINKS, HUMAN BOMB @ The Swan
The highly awaited arrival of Artimus Pyle finally.... and it gave those of us unlucky enough to have missed the SEVERED HEAD OF STATE gig the week earlier a chance to catch up on our crusty american hardcore. If you have been to the Swan before no doubt you've spent some time behind the big pillar in the middle of the room pondering the unfortunateness of its location as the band and a small army of raging moshers played out their opera of hate and fear unseen by you on the other side. Well, the good people who run the Swan (they're normally listening to ska on the other side of the bar, totally oblivious to the sheer amount of indiscreet take-away drinking going on in the hall- right) have thankfully made a few changes and now the "stage" area has moved to the long end of the room, giving more people a chance to actually watch the bands. They've also painted the whole room in a tropical carribean paradise theme... which is most tasteful.

The kidz who bring us the gigs at the Swan are a thoughtful, informed bunch and this gig was a perfect example of the kind of educated H.C. choices they make- Not only do they look equally good in a nurses dress or in SEIGE T-shirts and black army trousers and perhaps trainers, but they provide us with humbling samplings of new shit happenning in the punk/HC/thrash scene world wide. In short the gig fuckin' rocked, it had a good atmosphere and it smelt like DIY.

NATION OF FINKS played first and, being a combination of people from other bands like PALEHORSE (& Trencher?), were a really good HEAVY hardcore punk. The set started off with a totally misleading emo intro but then they blasted forth with solid, screamy, evil-sounding HC. Good shit.

Then it was HUMAN BOMB, which is also a bit of a punk 'uber group' having members of EX-CATHEDRA/ SCUNNERED, EBOLA/ SHANK etc... Due to the strong SHANK connection I was expecting a more power-violent (as in lots of little heavy metal parts all jammed in together) angle, but they played a very loud and heavy, but fairly straight-forward PUNK; it was time for a very drunk Em to put his fist in the air and scream out "yeeeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!" feeling the power of punk shotgunning through his veins! Andi Monkey who sang and played bass for SHANK is just singing for HUMAN BOMB and the guitarist is in this band as well... I'm sure that there were a few cover versions in the set, but the only one I caught was a sped up Clash cover that they had also injected with some more pure speed and distorted punch. Fucking good although members of the band say that it was the first gig that they've played and could have been better- this means that they are one to watch out for... and unlikely to play over here all the time as Stiff the bassist (used to play in EX-CATHEDRA) now lives in Holland and has joined the tribe of drunken nutters FLEAS & LICE. We wait with baited breath and baseball bats.

Next was ARTIMUS PYLE... I already had a pre-prejudiced view of what they might sound like as they were beardy, black-wearing punx hailing from Oakland California, the ancestral homeland of pissed off, evil-fucking-sounding, metal influenced punk fucking rock (DYSTOPIA moved there). And, sweet mother of jesus on the inverted cross, did they live up to that stereotype. Imagine NEUROSIS sped up and more pissed off ala DROP DEAD. Anyone who's a fan of crusty american heaviness (HIS HERO IS... etc) should check out this band- they had a great set and didn't even try to skimp us with some bull SHIT 15 min yanky bastard set, but played for a good while and rocked us very hard indeed.
I bought the CD 'FUCKED FROM BIRTH' and it's good. The lyrics swing between kinda political (songs against the U.S. whitewash for war, songs about their opinions on protest within a consumer society - i think!) to very personal and perhaps seriously depressed nature ("The art of self-seduction looks like shit on the wall of an empty room.") This CD is going to be intermittently depressing the hell out of me and making me bounce off the walls for the next few weeks (I'd better nail my windows shut or I might jump out.)

WORDS

GEORGINA'S ZINE REVIEWS:
30/04/2005

DORIS #22
po box 1734, Asheville, NC 28802 $1.20 (US)
I think Doris is one of the best zines around, it is such a great read. Lots of personal writing on feminism and anarchism.

LOSERDOM #12
Anto, 17 New Cobra Rd, Phibsboro, Dublin 7, Ireland
Cool arnarcho punk zine from Ireland. Writings on subcultures with a collection of interviews from people in the Dublin punk scene. comics, reviews and politics.

THE HAND THAT CRADELS THE ROCK #3
<mailto:red_chidgey@yahoo.com>red_chidgey@yahoo.com
Feminsit sex positive zine from the UK. The issue features interviews with a group of people in regards to their personal sexuality and ideas on sex.

ROUND THINGS ROLL #4
Allison, 204 Miller St. Fayetteville, AR 72703, USA
This is a travel zine including allison and her friends travelling experiences, nice layout and interesting to read but kind of brief.

A LESS INTIMATE DISAPPOINTMENT
<mailto:red_chidgey@yahoo.com>red_chidgey@yahoo.com
a personal zine from the uk that focuses on the subject of abuse and self harm. I espicaially liked this zine, well worth checking out.

CLIT ROCKET #2
<mailto:veruskaoutlaw@yahoo.it>veruskaoutlaw@yahoo.it
punk feminist queer zine from Italy. A lot of writing on gender, transgender and sexuality aswelll as interviews with Harum Scarum, The Haggard and Tribe 8.

KEEPING UP THE CONVERSATION #2
Alaina po box 1283, Carlton Vic. 3053 AUSTRALIA
This is the obsession edition, Alaina describes her passion for Barbie and bugs both interesting and funny, cool layout.

Em's ZINE REVIEWS:

These zine reviews are more like a chance for me to rant. Zines are such a great way to get your brain working... a chance to chew thoroughly on someone else's perspective... get inside their head a bit... or, as in "To Kill a Mockingbird," walk around in their shoes for a bit. So, forgive me if I go on tangents during reviews; I'm just documenting the interplay between my reality and the words and ideas I'm putting before me. These zines also reflect where I have travelled late 2003/ early 2004... so there's mostly material from where I visitted, zines from people I've met or whose peripheries I've crossed. We're gonna keep reviewing (and trading!) zines, so get in touch if you do one as well. If a zine sounds interesting, write the person who put it out! Long live the zine underground.

REALLY ITTY-BITTY ZINES:

DIRTY PICTURES BY DIRTY GIRLS #1 & 2- Two very small zines filled with 'dirty' doodles drawn by various pervy girls. Part 1 is under the general theme of "draw something dirty" and 2 is the "masturbate" issue. Some are hot, some are funny as hell, the whole thing is really cute and sexy and simple. Jana, who along with Liz started the idea, says that it all started out as a drunken project at two New Zealand punk fests where they approached local punk women and asked them to draw something dirty for it. Contributions and comments to: (POBox 7266, Wellington, New Zealand)

YOU- I bought this 'zine' in Melbourne and it's basically a letter and a badge/button packaged in a little manilla envelope that looks like something earrings would be put in if you bought them.... or a pakora. It's a hand written letter from 'Nicole' to someone she (perhaps) used to see. I say perhaps because it's not really clear if this is really an intimate letter to a former lover or an art school project that places the reader in the discomforting situation of feeling that they have, just by reading it, placed themselves in an uncomfortably intimate/intrusive position- or both. I read it on the Melbourne tram surrounded by city workers returning to the 'burbs from work and I felt like I was reading a love/lost letter to me as well as to the person that Nicole used to fuck. It seems like that was the point. It reminded me of all those semi-twisted "almost" relationships where one of you opens up and the other doesn't... or you just try to get it on with someone who is really just mis-matched to you and there is some psychic damage or confusion as a result. A bit of a mind fuck, no address on the thing of course, and, no Nicole, I'm not going to wear the badge... but thanx.

FAIRLY SMALLISH ZINES:

MY HEAD HURTS- A cute lil' A5 folded zine from Jane in Brisbane. This was Jane's first "solo" zine and is just everything she's done and thought about lately. Includes good info on the very real dangers of Food Irradiation, a list of other evil nuclear things goin' on in Australia, anti-sexism, cute comic about buying a van, lots of random bits and bobs and bits of interesting texts that she's pasted together with odd pictures. (A quick personal snapshot of her head avialable from Jane, 35 Handleys Rd, BAllard 4352, Australia or email steak409(at)hotmail.com)

CUNT FEATURES, pocket peeps & dirty pictures by Niki Matilda- More dirty doodles by a Wellington lady- there must be something in the water here. Actually Niki featured in the DIRTY PICTURES BY DIRTY GIRLS zine as well and it's nice to see this immaculately hand bound (and stitched!) compilation of some of Niki's saucy drawings. Niki is one of the people who's involved in THE GIRLIES' PROJECT, an all-laydee's art collective in Wellington. This book has lots of drawings- pencil, pen, crude, simple, on graph paper, maybe even traced sometimes- of womyn showing you their panties, tying each other up, with sailor tattoos or strap-on etc... there's a strong sense of personal fetish and exploration embedded within the "cute" venear. If pictures of Roy Lichtensteinesque beauties biting their lips as a cold sweat breaks out across their intense, furrowing brows turn your crank... or if you are interested in womyn reclaiming depictations of their own sexuality, then try to get this cool zine. Cross-stitchers take note. (nikimatilda(at)bikerider.com)

YE OL' A4 FOLDED:

BOZZEE #1- It's kinda pointless reviewing zines that don't have proper contact addresses for you, the reader, to contact the zinester by... it's even worse that alot of these addresses for the creaky old zines that I'm reviewing will be wrong as the kind of scum bags that make these little photocopied zines are likely to be gettting evicted even as we speak or simply dossing on their mates' couches as they try to "live for free" or something. When will the youth learn that only hard work and sacrifice can bring contentment? I do, however, HAVE to review BOZzee as it is a collection of drunk stories by various drunk losers in Aotearoa (new zealand). It's badly written, it's badly laid out, punk kids are having babies, stealing kegs out of the back of pubs and rolling them to gigs, puking, blacking out, forming bands that will never go anywhere etc etc etc. I think that this sloppy drunken zine has redeaming social value because it brought up the Scrabble-worthy converasation of how one really does spell the past-tense for having gone into a coma: "comaed"? Or "comad"? or "coma-ed"? Important stuff. (for a copy of this zine, go the Nelson on the south island of Aotearoa and look for the drunk punk girls with a kid in tow and possibly rolling a keg down the high street.)

DRESSING UP- Not so much a zine as an illustrated A4 book, this little publication features some very slick pen and ink "comics". Think Charles Rennie MacIntosh meets Gary Newman in the cathedral of the society of the spectacle, Victorian Bladerunner, minimalist scenarios for emo wusses. It's pretty, it's copyrighted, it's $7 Australian dollars. (Tim Rogers, 3/37 Victoria St, WEst End Qld 4101 Australia)

ENRAGED, journal of revolutionary action- I guess this is put out by the group Revolutionary Action... it's a "political" zine with a strong anarcho/communist slant. Articles on the war in Iraq, especially the phoney "rescue" of Jessica Lynch from the Iraqi hospital that saved her life, resistance to the war from within the ranks of the troops, plus Australian analysis, and one person's account of not making it to the s11 protest in Australia (in the year 2000- before s11 got hijacked by Islamic & American terrorists) where thousands of people severely disrupted the meeting of the World Economic Forum. (Revolutionary Action, POBox 167, Keiraville NSW 2500 Australia)

FAVERO, a collection of his artwork compiled by the Cave Clan- this is a memorial tribute to a member of the Cave Clan, a group of Australian urban underground explorers. Sadly Curtis Favero has passed away and this zine is the Cave Clans opportunity to share some of Favero's work with the wider public (those unlikely to be treking around in drain pipes under Melbourne.) Various comics, drawings and paintings, some on subteranean walls. (published by Knee Length Publishing, POBox 268, Abbotsford Victoria 3067)

GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY- yes, another review of a zine done by a queer girl... hey, I'm not complaining... I'm becoming some sort of inverse fag-hag, a dyke-tyke perhaps... or just a dingleberry on the arse of the queer scene- that sounds more likely. So, not to take the subject off of ME, but Liz's zine is a personal and random collection of stuff that she's thinking about or thinx is cool. It's dotted with great doodles and drawings and is very much on the sex+ tip. Lots of old pictures of sexy ladies from days gone by, Rants, inner questioning, helping a girl who's being followed by a creep, mix tape reviews, LE TIGRE/RED MONKEY stylings, porn fancy, very fun, very silly, very personal. (lizmathews(at)hotmail.com)

HER TONGUE #9- This publication is made by a collective that meets at Visible Ink Space in Australia. Lots of stuff for the ladies including radical cheerleading, poetry, erotica, essays, gender discussions and stuff about the origins of the words "vagina" and "cunt" favouring "cunt" cause it's not an old word for a sheath for a sword. Probably good people to get in touch with if you want to network with Australian feminists. (c/o Visible Ink, 139 Constance Street, Fortitude Valley, Australia)

IN TIL STUMPS #3- Apparently "immune to the life-threatening adulthood virus," Neil who lives near Brisbane Australia, does this very punk/HC cut and paste music centred zine. Neil is in DRAFT DODGER, who I had the pleasure to see when I was in Brisbane and they play 80's style punk ala NEGATIVE APPROACH/ BLACK FLAG with interesting lyrics that are political without seeming cliche and redundant. Anyway, the zine is good and all good punx should write Neil and get one. It's got that age-old staple of punk zines= lots of interviews! & this issue features AIDS, LOVE LIKE... ELECTROCUTION, THE PLAGUE, & AGAINST, plus a lengthy article on keeping punk music D.I.Y. & lots of the obligatory reviews and columns... The aesthetic is great in the classic punk zine sense, with little pictures of shit that you can't really make out peeping out from behind punk cut and paste blocks of text, fucked up fonts, the lot. It even looks like Neil prints out the words for his headers and then crumples them up into little balls and lets the cat play with them so that they'll look so "damaged" instead of just choosing a fuct-up looking font on the computer- old school! Neil (and his partner in crime Aron Manhands) are cheeky buggers but thoughtful (and sensative) and if you are looking for love in the greater Brisbane area, try shacking up with one of these losers. (Neil Bramley, POBox 5817, West End QLD 4101 Australia or hardwareyouth@hotmail.com)

LEZZARINE #3- personal zine of lesbian terrorist/queer lady from Melbourne Australia... coming out stories, details of every relationship she's been in, riot grrl, bad poetry, info on Rohypnol (the date rape drug), radical cheerleading. (Melamoo Lesbian Terrorist: goughsgrrl@hotmail.com)

PERSONALITY LIBERATION FRONT #4- (including a CD compilation from DEPLORABLE RECORDINGS)... the zine: Written by Kylie between 2000-2003, PLF is a dense, thought-provoking read that silmultaneously embraces punk/HC culture whilst deconstructing some of its traits that more closely resemble the society punk claims to oppose- sexism, unquestioned social roles, commodification etc. Unfortunately, the audience for this zine may be mainly young womyn and emo boys and NOT the very people who could benefit from some of the insights on its pages- "boys" in the punk HARDcore scene... Kylie keeps asking the same annoying questions that won't let you just get on with your valuable record collecting and moshing in the pit while your girlfriend holds your jacket... she challenges us to question our gender roles, our consumption-oriented "scene", our (gulp) identity and behaviour. There's alot of ideas inside and much to Kylie's credit (and despite the potentially patronising piece on mens' lib) she does not offer dogmatic, inflexible solutions or mandates, but simply raises flags on bullshit behaviour and opens a discussion on it. If you feel like a "fag" reading about queer and feminist stuff or think it's P.C, then put this zine on top of your MRR or whatever is sitting next to the toilet and give it a scan when you are by yourself. This issue contains personal explorations by 2 womyn on body image, a travel diary to Mexico, stuff on herbal abortions, the all-too mandatory self-important columnists section, interviews with Jamie of CONATION/ Brian of CATHARSIS / Laura of xSYNTHESISx zine and distro, the aforementioned mens' lib analysis "revolution boy style now," a survey on the same issue, a critique of punk's use of violent imagery to sell products & then loads and loads of reviews and stuff.

I fucking loved this zine and good on Kylie for having taken the time -and the guts- to produce it. As "a man" (hee hee), I found the dissection of ordained gender roles very helpful; it helped clarify alot of things that I've been thinking about how I've never really fit in with typical male society or bonding rituals... it offered better ways to think about the whole issue outside of the male/female (Coke/Pepsi) binary code.... For example, how the questioning of male programming by men and the consequent embracing of traits like empathy, emotion and "softness" as part of the fight against sexism is often described in terms of "men embracing their feminine side". Are these traits the sole domain of the female gender? Are these traits not enforced through social programming onto women and girls as well? Or is it all just testosterone-determined? Thus, alot of the time we may think and act like we are dealing with the problems of our rigid, gender specific upbringing, but, in doing so- and by not turning the whole paradigm on it's head (or side)- we may be re-enforcing it! Deja vu! Somewhere inside all of this mess, I just have to find who I am... seperate the REAL from the PROGRAM- and this involves alot of questioning & an amazing amount of observation and listening. So, as a boy, I need to shut my fucking mouth from time to time (or at least take note on who I shut up and listen to, their gender, the reasons etc)... For me, the most important thing about issue #4 is that EVERYBODY benefits when we subvert the restrictive gender roles an insane society has forced upon us... the capitalists want good workers and the religions want our souls (and our money), so FUCK THAT! Let's throw all our stereotypes out with the bathwater and get on with the living revolution. Anyway, get this zine. (Kylie/ Personality Liberatin Front, POBox 3023, South Brisbane BC Qld 4101, Australia)

TICK THE APPROPRIATE BOX #1 & 2- Another Australian zine, this zine is pretty sparse but was a really interesting (and funny!) read. #1 had Newspaper clippings, shit from the papers, handwritten quick rants, lots of HOMOCORE poster reproductions ready to by blown up and fly-posted around town &, the most hilarious part of the zine, the piss-take of the US government anti-terrorist website. They've taken the graphics off of the site and put their own descriptions of what's happenning and it is funny as fuck! http://www.ready.gov (or look around in this zine as I think I'll rip them off and use them to fill column space)... Le Tigre, Peaches, Body Image & this quote: "YOu must have a love affari with Yourself before you can have one with the rest of the world." Likewise, #2 has similar content, but with a more adbusters feel and lots of deconstructed ads from women's glossy magazines. (POBox 79, Fortitude Valley QLD 4006, Australia or uglyducklingzine(at)hotmail.com)

THE UGLY DUCKLING #4 & 5- This zine is done by Carmen in Australia who also does TICK THE APPROPRIATE BOX, so it has similar content. Lots of cut and paste articles and bits and bobs out of newspapers intermixed with hand-written stories from her life or things that she's thinking about. #4 has a scarey article from a 1955 issue of Good Housekeeping on how to be a good wife, shit about the 'war on terror', a story about getting depressed from sharing a flat with her boyfriend amongst other things. #5 was done in conjunction with Intl Women's DAy 2003, so has info on that plus some stories and articles that her friends have sent in: teaching in London, the mating habits of voles, anti-feminist newspaper columnists in Australia, stuff against empire and patriarchy. (POBox 79, Fortitude Valley QLD 4006, Australia or uglyducklingzine(at)hotmail.com )

THE VILLAGE BIKE #1- the first issue of Lucy's sex/politica/culture zine... As in number 2 of this zine it's a collection of very brief quotes and articles on a number of gender/queer related stuff. Cool lists of things to think about.... slut idol of the screen Jen (of Dawson's Creek) & Risso (of Grease)... Irony as re-appropriation... polyamory.. ethical, empowered sluthood etc.

ZEROX #8 & 9- Zerox is a well-written personal zine from Singapore done by a guy named Shaiful. If you are interested at all in SE Asia or the scene there, then he would be a good guy to get in touch with... a little cynical and very analytical, but a sound geezer nonetheless. Each issue is jam-packed with stuff, interviews, lots of rants on various subjects, classifieds, letters and reviews. Purist HC kids beware, Shaiful quite fancies the electronic end of things and the occassional blast (or drone) or pure noise as well, so this is not a punk-only zine. Issue #8 has stuff about his compulsory stint with the National Service, a very unique straight-edge pro-cannabis stance, and reports from Macedonia, Hawaii, Phillipines, Thailand +. Issue #9 has more info on Shaiful's life, pro-cassette tape propaganda, an interview with a german band maned Wojczech who toured SE Asia, more classifieds, experimental music, scene reports and reactions to the war in Iraq. (Write: Shaiful, Blk 554 Bedok North St 3, #08-241 Singapore 460554 SINGAPORE or trashkore(at)yahoo.com)

ZINES OF A RATHER LARGER SIZE:

IMMINENT REBELLION #1- "a great platform for communication and debate amongst New Zealand anarchists" and hoping to create "an anarchist presence within Aotearoa," this zine sets out to do just that. Interesting to use the word "platform" in your first editorial, this zine is an excercise in classical ABC Anarchism ala Love & Rage/"workers of the world rise up" style. Yep, call me a jaded old cynic, but even the title's use of the word "Imminent" issues calls of "don't hold your breath" from my mouth. Before your knee jerks up and hits the bottom of your chin, hear me out. I believe that rebellion is real and is already happenning all around the world; It's a response to pressures, material conditions, oppression and exploitation in anyone's everyday life. For many it is not a choice per se and has little to do with a pre-determined political theory.. Thus the title calls to mind a certain emphasis on the historical imperative, ideas of linear progress and the concept of revolution as a singular point in time rather than the ongoing antagonism between power and rebellion. There are some interesting bits amidst the History of Anarchism 101, such as the Maori perspective of Anarchy (written in '93 by a womyn who's now joined the bloody Green Party), but as a whole this zine is rather offputting... It covers all the right subjects- Anarchism and Feminism, the anti-GE movement's need for a more thorough analysis of capitalism, the Maori perspective, but, in the end, it reads like a Socialist Workers' paper that is trying to use these other popular issues to re-direct interested people back to the central tenants of the glorious ideology- in this case capital A Anarchism. This all sounds a little harsh when in fact IMMINENT REBELLION may prove to be a useful space for debate and the dissemination of info on anti-authoritarian stuff happenning around Aotearoa.... Being from "New" Zealand, it would also be great to see even more info on colonialism, the South Pacific islands/area and the role of 19th Century European ideological currents on the lives of indiginous peoples everywhere. Are they gonna have to build factories to be free? (Imminent Rebellion, POBox 1913 Christchruch Aotearoa or imminentrebellion(at)enzyme.org.uk)

IN YA FACE, journal of Barricade Books- this is the zine of Barricade Books and Infoshop in Melbourne Australia... this issue is probably a bit old, but I think it's the last one so far. This issue contains an article on the future of a movement for social justice in Australia, points on the political differences and strategies of those involved in the anti-WTO protests in 2002, the prison system, affinity groups, lots of circle A's, building an anti-war movement, Woomera, Aboriginal sovereignty, a free school in Spain, Russian revolution stuff, novelist B. Traven, A brief intro to pirate ladies Anne Bonny & Mary Read & reviews. (postal address: POBox 199, East Brunswick, Vic 3057 Australia or infoshop(at)bedlam.anarki.net)

ITINERANT GREASE, the d.i.y. mad scientists guide to running yer diesel vehicle using waste vegoil & biofuels- need I say more? A total "how to" and resource zine for making the jump from traditional petroleum to chip oil or the like. (www.tin.rant or londonsavage(at)yahoo.co.uk)

LITTLE GUY WITH BIG HOPES #7- this regular zine is put out by Geoff, a regular in the activist/anarchist scene in Wellington who's recently gone back to the land and is starting a communal project up the West Coast of the north island of Aotearoa near a town named Wangatui. The zine is a nice mix of total anarcho politix and very very personal writing on a variety of subjects. Geoff never fails to include himself in the discourse and, thus, this zine is less dry and removed than other publications of its ilk. This issue includes writings on revolution (of course), the police, primitivism, world "hunger", how to build a loft, polyamory, the state of punk, mental health, Fear and it's central role for post-s11 American global control, stopping rape, drinking your own urine, Tino Rangatiratanga (roughly translated as Maori self-determination) and capitalism as written by one Maori activist & a good nutritional piece on IRON (or the occasional lack thereof in vegetarians.) This zine is available internationally by trade ONLY, "keep your money, give me your thoughts instead." (Little Guy, POBox 9263, Te Aro, Wellington, Aotearoa/New Zealand or littleguy(at)buzz.net.nz)